What do men want?

I once read a joke that marriageable men are more like parking lots- most of the good ones are already taken. For women who have been not been fortunate to find a stable man. It’s kinda frustrating, especially when there was a season in a lady’s life she once had streams of guys to pick from. They keep asking other women, their friends, mothers and other men, “What exactly do men want?” Finding the right man is the dream of any woman, a quick trace of the history of the life of feminist will trace their posture to the failure of one guy somewhere in the past. More women have even been lucky but somehow, they lose the men to things and factors they are still trying to figure out.

A lot of the reasons are partly because of erroneous beliefs about men; Men just want to have fun and “freedom” with no responsibility; Men like the chase; If you’re too “easy” or approachable, they’ll get bored or lose interest; Men are dominant in relationships and women therefore are unable to express themselves, but then if you follow a few simple effective guidelines, they’ll be much more likely to get exactly what they want from men: a fulfilling, healthy, happy relationship. These misconceptions and beliefs about men women and men clung to are actually causing women to hurt in relationships.

This has caused more women to say that men confuse them and that they are unsure what a man is really looking for. They have tried to please them in the past and it hasn’t worked so no; the man can concentrate on pleasing them or leave. If the today’s society woman is to be believed, they don’t care what a man is looking for anymore because they have been empowered by their own sexuality and are comfortable in their new role as sexually liberated career woman in charge of their own destiny. In which case, as long as the man wants them, that is fine.

But then, deep within every woman, is the need to be loved and taken care of by a man, but then that depends on his needs being met.

I must warn you that my list is not what women want men to want, which, predictably, is a considerably different list. But if the idea is to understand men so that you might get along better, right? Well, this guide works, trust me – it is proven and tested

Men want a woman who will commit to them. Though increasingly this is hard to find, it doesn’t take away the craving in the need of their hearts. For a man Love id defined by respect, while for a woman, it’s selflessness. The man must be incredibly strong to resist a woman they find out can share their life with, someone they can trust and be open with. I know a lot of women want the opposite way round, but then, no man will commit to any woman, if he knows you do not respect him.

Men want you to support them in their work and help boost their confidence- he wants you to be his number one fan. Women who understand men do not put them down even when failing. Women who understand this ask even dump their careers to support the dreams of their man- ok, that’s very rare, but sound. I have discovered those who have had wonderful marriages have come into aligning their visions with one another to support each others’ goals. Common, just be a “you can do it, baby!” lady, and in return, women will find their man equally supportive because she understands him and does things to let him know she’s a believer. Call it enlightened self interest.

Men are seeking women who are feminine, gentle and kind because deep down the qualities that make a woman a great mother is an attraction in themselves. I do not suggest that the man himself needs mothering, though some do; it is more the point that men seek the attributes in women that point to someone who would make a great mother to future their offspring, not someone who’d rather rate her career above the destiny of the kids. The guy will just generally beat a retreat!

Men want a fun and exciting companion. There are things that a man will discuss with a woman if the level of communication and trust has been established. Sharing activities can also be a healthy way to build relationships. Exciting to some men may different things. So, what I recommend is know what you enjoy and find men who enjoy those activities. If women spend more time with men sharing some activities each week they are likely to get along better with the men in their lives. Men want to have a good time and relax when not working and so their ideal partners are women who are not supposed to have PhDs in nagging.(By the way PhD is pull- him-down)

Men love women who are masters of emotion. For example, men hardly ever like women who shout. They want a woman who can debate and converse and are both able to discuss issues with a view to evolving”our one view”. Communication is king. A fiery passionate temperament may have made you interesting and challenging to your man, but then women chase men away by competing with them; making them they dart of your emotions and expecting them to be the solution to all your emotional hurts, even the one your parents and the other guy caused.

Though men love challenging women, someone who keeps them on their toes. Men are generally lazy in relationships once they feel they’re  secure. When a man is challenged so he does something about it. If you want to keep your man interested, keep him challenged and in suspense (!- this is far from the ideals of delaying to tell him you love him)

Whichever way, what you give comes back to you. Instead of complaining when he withdraws, complains or makes an observation, have you wondered if it was because of the way you’ve been relating with him? When we give love, kindness, and respect, we will experience the law of abundance in action.

Men need you to give them private time to be left alone, to spend on hobbies and sports, and to spend time with other men. Some men need a few minutes to unwind when they walk in the door before sharing the day’s challenges. Some women need this space too, but. Do what works best for your relationship. I find that a sincere and compassionately deep hug upon greeting is nice, followed by a thirty-second kiss sometime in the next few minutes, helps re-establish that “connected” feeling.

Above all, nothing works more than understanding your man and loving him uniquely, and making him crazy about what he craves.

Watch out for what women want