me@adeolakayode.com
Facebook
Twitter
Google+
LinkedIn
YouTube
RSS
adeolakayodeadeolakayode
  • Home
  • About Me
  • My Projects
    • Projects
    • Free Courses
    • Presentations
  • Blog
  • Press
  • My Digital Toolkit
    • Branding
    • social media
    • Business
  • My Books
  • Contact

Why relationships fail 2

April 6, 2008deolalife, relationships1 comment

This will be the concluding part of my post on certain factors that make relationships fail.

SUCCESSFUL CONFLICTSConflicts may be absolutely normal in relationships, but too much of disagreements and issues may destroy the emotional strengths, deplete trust and increase the amount of doubt in the future of the relationship. Conflicts in the relationship are indications of the places that need ironing out between the new lovers. Lovers must ensure that their position and wants (habits, attitudes and preferences) do not threaten the very fabric of the relationship.

We must therefore enter into relationships with the mindset of, in the words of Norman Wright as immigrants and not colonialists. Immigrants enter into cities and countries with an open mind, to grow, to learn, and to adapt to the environment in which they were finding themselves. Colonialists, especially the ones to Africa depict a mean and selfish stance towards development. Colonial lovers, like the ones who colonized Africa will never want to learn about the other, they will try to enforce their lifestyle, habits, language and preferences on the other partner instead of learning to adjust to and with their partner. Even with conflicts, they never could be the reason why relationships end; it is the depletion of trust in the future of the relationship. So watch out, those fits may harm your heart!

COMPROMISE

??????The word compromise may be a very dreadful word for some other people. It probably connotes succumbing to lower unwanted standards. In the case of relationships, it a posture that gives people room for error and admits no one is perfect. It is interesting to know people want relationships without giving people room for growth or errors, while others toleratethem. Those unwilling to forgive, can pretty much count on having more unhealthy relationships over time. Relationships based on anger, spite, disgust, resentment or other negative feelings associated with lack of forgiveness are disasters waiting to happen. Love relationships are like flowers. They need tending to or they’ll die.

SHALLOW RELATIONSHIPS

So many relationships revolve around eateries, dinners, parties and events and fun- in short everything that spells excitement except reality. Many of those in these kind of unhealthy relationships simply avoid facing reality and issues that can threaten the existence of the relationship. There are many reasons for this. For instance, deep down inside, the people involved may be trying to make themselves appear to be the perfect spouse. Or perhaps they don’t want to face the fact that their mates really aren’t who they say they are. For example, Person A could be trying to avoid reality and make up excuses to cover up an affair that Person B is involved in so that it doesn’t destroy their “perfect image” in everyone’s eyes. These kinds of situation called “relationships” are usually exclusive to the lovers in that they are kind of isolated from their friends, thus isolated from external and unbiased views of others.

since humans attitudes, history and personalities are variables, the factors are endless. the factors are just pointers to the fact that things reraly happen suddenly and without our contributions. it is better to recognize our positions and work towards a long lasing happiness. ciao

00000
deola
passionate..change agent.people empowerment..simply driven.
Previous post Why relationships fail Next post How to escape the unemployable 70%: Boosting your employment edge

1 comment. Leave new

contractors raleigh nc
May 16, 2011 2:30 pm

Most I can say is, I don’t know what to really say! Except certainly, for the wonderful tips which have been shared within this http://adeolakayode.com/2008/04/06/why-relationships-fail-ii/ blog. I’m able to think of a trillion fun strategies to read the articles on this site. I believe I will ultimately make a move employing your tips on those issues I could not have been able to address alone. You had been so clever to permit me to be one of those to benefit from your helpful information. Please realize how much I appreciate it.

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Recent Posts

  • Stop falling in love with your business ideas
  • Emotional Storytelling: Why Brands are Campaigning through Authentic Human Stories
  • The Ultimate Guide to Designing a Workable Business Plan
  • Digital Epidemic: Here’s why I wrote a Digital Marketing book for Africa
  • Facebook: From Social Network to Media Giant
  • Being thirteen: What your teen knows will shock you
  • Blogging and social media issues that rocked 2015 in Nigeria
  • Five Tactics to Boost your Marketing in 2016
  • Dealing with Information Overload
  • How Mobile Messaging is driving Ecommerce

Recent Comments

  • Ekene on Ideas rule the world… but then, who rules ideas?
  • MD John Mary on NIGERIAN ROLE MODELS: Erastus Akingbola
  • Coach on How to kill your productivity – one day at a time
  • Favour on Ideas rule the world… but then, who rules ideas?
  • Niyi James on Ideas rule the world… but then, who rules ideas?

Categories

Recent Posts

  • Stop falling in love with your business ideas
  • Emotional Storytelling: Why Brands are Campaigning through Authentic Human Stories
  • The Ultimate Guide to Designing a Workable Business Plan
  • Digital Epidemic: Here’s why I wrote a Digital Marketing book for Africa
  • Facebook: From Social Network to Media Giant

Contacts

me@adeolakayode.com

Social

Facebook
Twitter
Google+
LinkedIn
YouTube
RSS
Tweets by @delola
  • Home
  • Blog
  • Hire me
  • My Work
  • About Me
  • Contact
© 2015 All rights reserved.